Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
You pole danced in your parka.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
