One girl and one boy is just not enough.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize