He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
tell me about the fingering
Randomize