There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
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