So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
