Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
