the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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