Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
