We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
and she was petting her beer can
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
