Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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