I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
