weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
