fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
