Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
