Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize