I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
