I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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