He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
