that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I have peed in a lot of sinks
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize