Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
