just tell him i said nine months
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize