is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
