u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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