I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
