My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize