butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
