Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
thus making me awesome and them whores
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
