do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
