Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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