Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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