you guys were way drunker than both of me
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize