Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
