**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize