I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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