apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
