Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
