I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
