Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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