this beer tastes like vomit already
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
