she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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