i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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