i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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