Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
