I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
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