So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize