if you like me you must not know who I am
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize