Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
i out mim tonsoeep
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
