that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize