So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
