Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
