my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
